Nursing

Come walk in our shoes for a 12-hour shift. Come see the joy, the tragedy, the comedy, the 100 ways we are pulled and pushed, then rate my "pleasant greeting", "answers call light in timely fashion", "states name of patient."Use the bathroom now, because you might not get the chance again until your shift ends. Wear comfortable shoes. Don't worry if they're clean. They'll end up with blood and vomit on them. We are the patient's advocate, the doctors' eyes and ears, and everyone's scapegoat. We can page your doctor but we can't make that doctor magically appear. We check your stitches, wipe your blood, drain your pus and empty your bedpan. Nursing is a tough job, but we're tougher. We've been yelled at by administrators, supervisors and doctors. We've been kicked, slapped, punched, spat on, and sexually harassed by patients in various states of delirium, mental illness, arrogance, and intoxication. We've even had chairs and food trays thrown at us. We work mandatory overtime, weekends and holidays. We eat Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners with coworkers. We deal with families who ignore visiting hours, bring food to patients on restricted diets, and insist on staying the night even though it's not a private room. We deal with the Florida son who orders us around to show a parent whom he's neglected for years, that he cares. We help deliver your children into this world safely. We cannot be at your side every waking minute. We have 10 other patients. We cannot answer 5 call lights at once. We can't stop doing CPR on a patient because you ran out of tissues. We are not maids, beauticians, or cocktail waitresses. We are professionals with college degrees. We hate that we can't spend more bedside time with you. Swearing at us will not make us move faster. Taking better care of your health would help. Quit smoking. Lose weight. Start exercising. Stop drinking. How do we survive? We ignore the nasty comments, the demanding relatives, the crazy staffing grids. We count to 10 before speaking. We pray every morning for strength and wisdom, patience and empathy. We drive home tired and frustrated, telling ourselves over and over , "I'm not the nurse I want to be, but I'm the best nurse the hospital staffing allows me to be." We fall asleep praying for the ones who won't survive the night. There is no finish line, ever. Nursing is demanding, fulfilling, and we can't imagine doing anything else. Nothing beats washing blood and glass off a car crash survivor , stabilizing a broken neck, saving a diabetic's leg, keeping a cancer patient in remission. The day we send a patient home we relish the unbelievable resilience of the human body and spirit. We did not become nurses for the hours, the salary, or the glamour of it all. We became nurses to make a difference. We don't ask for much. One sincere "Thank You" makes it all worth it.

A New Beginning

So IUI #1 was a bust and I am totally crushed. Each day that goes by I am a little better, but I did not think I would take a failed cycle that hard. I guess I just really thought it worked. Although I still don't think IVF is a path we will need to take (hopefully), it is still hard to be optimistic after a failed cycle.

Tomorrow marks a new week and a new cycle. I will start my femara tomorrow and continue with my cycle the same as with the first cycle. I requested adding a few days of an injection this cycle, but I am pretty sure my idea was shot down. Apparently being my age and having more than 2 follicles is "too risky". I just worry that it didn't work the first time, why would it work this time? Please God give me strength and optimism for this cycle

9 DPO

The 2ww is making me nuts!!!! My DH keeps telling me not to look into things too much but I just can't. I had cramping 5-7dpo and immediately though implantation!!!!! I am so hopeful for this cycle and I hope my happiness continues. One thing that has been driving me nuts is that my breasts/nipples have not been as sore as they usually are. Is this a good sign or a bad sign?? My mind is driving me crazy. I am EXTREMELY tired and all I want to do is sleep through the rest of this 2ww. I know this post is kind of jumbled, but I feel a little better now. Hopefully the next time I post it will be with pictures of a BFP!!