So I was working tonight and had a patient that just had her 10th baby. Like all of my patients, the dreaded "Do you have kids?" question was asked and I simply stated "not yet". Of course that answer is never good enough for them and I go more into depth. Well tonight this lady said something that for some reason did not sit well with me. My pt said that I should feel "LUCKY" for having to do IVF! I had to bite my tongue and just smile, but my whole drive home that is all I could think of. I know that I should feel grateful for finally having an answer and solution, but sometimes I feel cheated that I never had the chance to try any other fertility treatments. I by all means did not want to suffer a long, emotional, unsuccessful journey of TTC, but I also had IVF as a final step in my mind, not a starting point.
I always had a feeling that I was going to have problems TTC. I know it sounds crazy, but I remember crying to my OB when I was 16 yrs old, that I was scared I would have problems getting pregnant. She simply stated "you are so young and have plenty of time before you have to worry about that" Now, I am 25 yrs old with more reproductive problems than I ever imagined. How did this happen?????? Why me????? It's not fair!!!!!!! I do realize there are people who are far worse off than me, but I seem to be having my own pity party tonight
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Bobbi-It amazes me the stupid things that people can say. Someone once told me, last year, that I was lucky not get a period. Hmm, doesn't help with getting pregnant when you don't have a period or ovulate. I have also heard so many silly comments in regards to my MS. Sometimes people don't think before they speak or they don't know what to say and say something silly.
ReplyDeleteIF sucks and you are allowed to have your pity party when you need it!
Hope to see you soon :)
Margit
You are not entitled to a pity party. Suck it, you genetic dead end...
DeleteBobbi-
ReplyDeleteThat is awful! I just don't understand where people think that they should say something so inappropriate. That's like saying that someone should feel lucky to have cancer. Why would someone ever feel lucky to have to go through IF or any other medical condition. I know that I often think how "lucky" I am to be able to afford doing IVF. Is it possible that she was coming from a financial perspective? Not that it makes it any easier to understand her comment, that is for sure! I hope you are feeling better today. It is nice to have a pity party sometimes...unfortunately I have gotten pretty good at it. IF stinks!!
Hang in there!
Kris
Your genes are blatantly shit if you need IVF...
DeleteBobbi, I found you! Welcome to the blog world! I look forward to following your journey. I'm so sorry that you had to deal with that. Most people just don't get it and really don't get it. Yeah, you and the rest of us who had/have to do IVF are "lucky" ... we get to turn baby making into a science experiment and spend $1000s doing it! WTF?! Some people are idiots and shouldn't speak! IF sucks and pity parties for one (or maybe two if dh is involved) come with the territory. Many hugs and well wishes to you!
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